1000 Ways to Die (season 3, 2010)

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The TV show 1000 Ways to Die aired on the cable channel Spike.

Season Episodes Premiere date Finale date
1 12 May 14, 2008 (2008-05-14) April 5, 2009 (2009-04-05)
2 12 December 6, 2009 (2009-12-06) February 24, 2010 (2010-02-24)
3 (2010) 42 August 3, 2010 (2010-08-03) December 29, 2010 (2010-12-29)
3 (2011)
3 (2012)
4 8 March 12, 2012 (2012-03-12) July 15, 2012 (2012-07-15)

Episode 25: Death On A Stick[edit]

Originally aired August 3, 2010.

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
354 Blood Bath & Beyond May 11, 2005 Queens, NY A landlord uses a fiber optic scope to spy on young female tenants. One day, while he is spying on a woman from below in her bathroom, the floor above collapses from water damage due to all the holes he drilled, and the tub (with the bathing woman inside of it) falls through and crushes his head.
418 Easy Slider May 17, 2008 Henderson, NV A couple finds a pool to hop into while the owners are away. After getting drunk and playing in the pool, the man takes out a tarp and prepares to slide in the pool, not noticing the nail (from when he was playing with a nail gun earlier) sticking up in the center of it. He then slides down the tarp, is eviscerated, and is killed quickly from blood loss and hypovolemic shock by the time he lands in the water.
337 Mine Over Splatter May 8, 1985 Da Nang, Vietnam Three former Vietnamese soldiers are arguing about what is the best aphrodisiac and decide to settle the score once and for all by playing Russian roulette. The three all dodge the bullet in the gun they use for the game and feel so invincible that they stomp the ground, which sets off an underground land mine left over from the Vietnam War that was buried underneath their shack. The explosion demolishes the shack and leaves nothing but a severed head from one of the men.
261 Gum's the Word December 9, 2003 Palm Springs, CA A male nurse who has sex with and robs old women of their money and valuables targets an old lady who has bad breath (a disgusting fact the man finds out after the old lady kisses him). After feeling sick, he runs into the bathroom and ingests several denture whitening tablets he believed were mints. When he tries washing them down with water that had more denture cleaner dissolved in it, the chemicals dissolve his digestive tract while removing the oxygen in his blood. He bleeds and suffocates on the bathroom floor.
378 Bird Brained May 31, 2007 New York, NY A politically conservative bachelorette has a party in a limousine with her friends. She plans on just getting drunk on champagne, until her friends give her absinthe. In a drunken stupor, she sticks her head out of the limousine's sunroof and a low flying pigeon flies into her open mouth, snapping her neck.
919 Inquisi-Torn June 6, 1483 Cordoba, Spain An inventor of the Spanish Donkey named Father Gomez is denounced as a heretic during the Spanish Inquisition. He is then placed on his own device and is slowly split to death.
87 Boys 2 Dead June 23, 2009 Canoga Park, CA A has-been boy band is playing a performance at a bar to a less-than-excited audience, with the exception of a drunk woman. While envisioning a roaring crowd of fans, the lead singer then decides to crowd surf, but no one catches him, and when he lands on the floor, the fall breaks his neck and damages his spine a few seconds later. The other members of the band continue their performance after realizing the lead singer is dead.

Episode 26: Putting A Smiley Face On Death[edit]

Originally aired September 14, 2010.

Title quotation from: Narrator Ron Perlman while giving his intro to this episode.

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
400 Fat-ality May 15, 2006 Austin, TX An obese man dreams of becoming a bodybuilder, but is too lazy to exercise and cannot afford to pay for a liposuction. The man requests the aid of a friend to perform a rather unorthodox method of liposuction on him by using a shop-vac. During the procedure, the friend accidentally latches onto one of the man's intestines and begins sucking them out. The friend manages to turn off the shop-vac, but not in time to save his friend from death from blood loss and shock.
608 Catch and Decease June 17, 2008 The Amazon A man in the Amazon hires a group of natives to search for gold and abuses them while they are doing so. While swimming in a river nearby, he relieves himself in the river, attracting a candiru, which enters his penis and attaches itself to the side of his urethra. The man rips the fish out, along with much of the inside of his penis, and is soon eaten alive by piranhas attracted by the escaping blood, much to the amusement of the men he had hired.
278 Gas-Holed January 5, 2009 Palm Beach, FL A proctologist with a fetish for women's rears begins to operate on a pole dancer who damaged her rectum during a porno movie shoot. Prior to the operation, the doctor forgets to advise her not to eat anything 12 hours before the operation. On the day of the operation, the doctor's cauterizer ignites the woman's flatulence (due to a chili dog she ate), creating a fireball which travels through the doctor's windpipe and incinerates his lungs, suffocating him in seconds.
869 Back Stabbed 10th century (around 950 A.D.) Scotland The king of a Viking clan leads a campaign of marauding, leaving his younger brother in charge during his expedition. The younger Viking celebrates by having sex with the women. When she tries to shut it down, he rapes the queen (his sister-in-law). A few months later, when he returns, the king catches his brother in bed with his wife and sentences him to death by a form of torture known as the "Blood Eagle", in which the victim is stabbed in the back, his ribcage is ripped open, and his lungs are pulled out of his back, causing the victim's lungs to deflate from lack of pressure and suffocating the victim.
617 USSR-Dead October 12, 1989 Brighton Beach, NY A Ukrainian immigrant seeking to join the Russian Mafia is asked by two mobsters to beat down several patsies for not paying their debts. After he does the deed, the mobsters burn the man's fingertips with sulfuric acid so that he will not leave fingerprints. To celebrate the man joining the mafia, the elderly and senile bartender pours drinks for the mobsters. However, he mistakenly picks up the acid instead of the vodka bottle as the two bottles and liquid look identical. None of the men notice until it's too late, and the acid dissolves their tissue and organs.
55 Cardiac A-Breast August 2, 2006 Galena, IL A woman about to go out for a party, hoping to end with a date, wears a metal-lined bra to improve the shape of her bust. A sudden thunderstorm allows her to show herself off, getting the attention of everyone at the party, until a bolt of lightning hits the woman's metal bra, electrocuting her instantly.
303 Road Killed July 10, 2008 Bend, OR A nature-loving hippie on her way to a hemp convention accidentally runs over a raccoon. Distraught, she tries to perform CPR on the animal and, while looking up to inhale, gets decapitated by the bumper of a passing truck of which the driver did not see her in the middle of the road.

Episode 27: Stupid is as Stupid Dies[edit]

Originally aired September 21, 2010.

Title reference: A play on the saying "stupid is as stupid does".

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
444-A Jaw Boned July 4, 2004 Orangeville, MI A once-promising young chemist has now become a drug addict who spends his days making crystal meth in the garage of his house. His only nutrition is a piece of 6-day-old gum that he dips in citric acid every hour to keep it moist and fresh. In his drug-addled rush, the man accidentally dips the gum in red phosphorus instead. The force of his chewing causes it to explode, tearing off his lower jaw and causing him to die from bleeding out in his brain.
412-C Hair Today, Dead Tomorrow May 1, 1968 San Francisco, CA A female nudist painter lapses into a coma and dies after months of digestive problems caused by her trichophagia, an obsession with eating hair. At the morgue, the coroners discover a bezoar in her intestines, which was clogged with enough hair and undigested food to cause intestinal rupturing and internal bleeding.
620 Mudder Sucked November 21, 2009 Brentwood, CA A strict, sadistic pledge mistress (and military brat) at a sorority bullies her pledges during frosh week. At the end of the week, the pledges are instructed to build a mud wrestling pit for a charity event, but as she continues to harass them, one of the pledges gets fed up and attacks the pledge mistress. The pledge mistress proves to be the superior fighter, with the other pledges having to drag their defeated friend out of the pit. But as she is celebrating her victory, the pledge mistress begins to fall into the sinkhole that was beneath the ring the pledges were building and is sucked into the ground, eventually suffocating from the tons of dirt and mud pressing on her chest.
223 Offed the Hook July 17, 2003 Black Rock, OR A survivalist armed with a shotgun, a chain and meat hook is shown dying in three scenarios (the last of which actually happened to him): 1) Electrocuted after throwing his meat hook onto a power line so he can poach electricity for his TV, 2) Hanged on a tree branch after using his meat hook and chain to string up an elk carcass, and 3) Tripping in a ditch and performing an accidental tracheotomy after swallowing his own meat hook.
672 Erecto-Phobia June 9, 2007 Washington D.C. A man cheating on his girlfriend gets bitten by a Brazilian wandering spider while getting some bananas out of her grocery bag. The spider's venom causes his blood vessels to dilate, resulting in a permanent erection. After he has sex with two other women, the venom causes him to have a heart attack.
299 Fansicle October 19, 2009 Cool Rapids, MI A football fanatic paints himself in his team's colors (blue and white) and goes to a game in freezing weather. Sitting drunk and half-naked in the stands, he begins to develop hypothermia; however, no one can tell due to his blue paint and he loses the ability to speak, quickly freezing to death.
517 Tongue Tied April 16, 2006 Long Beach, CA A group of teens play a game in which two of them kiss while in adjacent moving cars. The couple's tongue piercings get tangled in each other, and they are decapitated by a forklift traveling between the cars.

Episode 28: Dead Wrongs[edit]

Originally aired September 28, 2010

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
179 Pam Caked! October 19, 2007 Beaumont, TX A cruel high school cheerleader captain gets jealous when a new girl joins the cheerleader squad, becomes the new flyer, and dates the quarterback who was previously dating the captain. On homecoming night, as the girls are about to do the heel stretch formation with the new girl on top, the captain lets her go, and she falls. Before she can gloat, the captain steps in front of the banner and gets trampled by the football team as they run through it.
124 Bibli-killed June 6, 2006 Hancock, IA Two con artists posing as preachers go around the country handing out Bibles and having sex with their female customers. One day, they end up at a farm, where they attempt to have sex with the farmer's granddaughter. Hearing the commotion, the farmer's wife chases the men with a shotgun. They hide in a grain silo. When he uses a lighter to see where they are, however, one of the men ends up killing himself and his partner from a dust explosion.
779 Eel Effects May 10, 2007 Washington, D.C. At a sushi chef school, only 2 out of 25 students have graduated. As a custom, the head sushi chef shares shots of sake with his students to celebrate their graduation. After he passes out drunk, the students decide to put a Japanese eel down his pants as payback for the chef's abusive punishments (one of which was threatening to shove an eel up their rectums). The eel slithers through his rectum and eats its way out causing him to bleed to death.
207 Glow Job May 1, 2006 Los Angeles, CA A drug dealer does business at a rave, but gets bored when business slows down. He then decides to take a few hits of ecstasy. In his high, he injects himself with fluid from a glow stick and dies of phenol poisoning.
557 D-Parted September 20, 2008 Reno, NV A recently divorced woman attempts to seduce three construction workers into her house. When she asks him to put sun tan lotion on her back while she is wearing nothing more than a bikini, one of them loses control of the concrete saw, which launches the blade at the woman and bisects her through her torso, causing nearly instant death.
746 Pornicated April 19, 2010 Tucson, AZ A porn addicted compulsive hoarder throws out everything in his wife's vanity to make room for his dirty movies, prompting his long-suffering wife of 35 years to leave him. Unfazed, the man continues to feed his addiction, but forgets to eat and drink. Disoriented, he begins to stagger his way out of the house, but because he has been hoarding so much X-rated material over the years, he gets trapped, collapses on the floor from severe dehydration, and dies.
156 Hard Balled April 2, 2006 Durham, NC A bullying lacrosse player hurls balls at other college students to impress coeds. One ball bounces off the wall, and when he is distracted by the most attractive girl at the school walking by, it hits him in the chest and triggers commotio cordis, causing him to die of arrhythmia.

Episode 29: Fatal Distractions[edit]

Originally aired October 5, 2010.

Title reference: Spoofs the Animal Planet TV series Fatal Attractions.

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
507 Golden Die-Angle April 8, 1996 Laos A Golden Triangle drug lord with a penchant for decapitating trespassers with a machete receives a call that a few trespassers are stealing from his poppy fields. He mounts his ATV and chases after them. While they hide, the man tries to track the robbers down, forgetting about a barbed wire rope he set up as a security measure. The man drives into the barbed wire at high speed and is (ironically) decapitated.
243 Clay Achin' June 3, 2006 Astoria, OR Two stoners create a clay bong that uses flavored disks to make the marijuana smoke taste like different foods. They contact a friend with a homemade kiln. After some time, they check on the progress of the bong. After seeing that it has gone out, the stoners drop a lighter into the kiln. The lit match ignites the propane gas inside, causing an explosion which turns the clay into deadly shrapnel, killing them. (Cannabis rights activist Ed Forchion guest stars in this segment, providing commentary on Cannabis culture.)
159 Death of Sum Young Guy January 19, 2009 San Diego, CA A gluttonous, obese man arrives at a Chinese restaurant for an all-you-can-eat buffet. After already eating at other restaurants (and nearly choking to death at the current restaurant), he suffers a heart attack from the MSG that accumulated in his system from nothing but a steady diet of Chinese buffet food.
239 Crib Your Enthusiasm September 12, 2009 Redwood City, CA A couple who enjoy baby-mother roleplaying build a full nursery, complete with an adult-sized drop-side crib. During one session, the wife leaves for a brief break, resulting in her husband throwing a tantrum. Accidentally throwing his teddy bear out of the crib, the man reaches through the bars to try to grab it. He shakes the crib with enough force to unlock the gate, which falls and severs the man's vertebrae, asphyxiating him.
929 Turtle Waxed August 17, 2010 Mojave Natl Park An animal-poaching married couple attempt to find rare animals to sell on the wildlife black market. They spot a rare, endangered turtle, and the husband attempts to capture it. However, a bald eagle swoops down and snatches the turtle before he can. The eagle drops the turtle from a high altitude to break its shell, but it lands on the husband's head, breaking through his skull and sending him into cardiac arrest.
282 Potty Mouth July 21, 2008 Spokane, WA A geophagic executive of a failing loan office reaches the point where she has to eat her hippie neighbor's organic soil to manage her anxiety, unknowingly consuming a mixture of compost and her neighbor's own feces. She ends up contracting a virulent strain of E. coli and she contracts severe diarrhea and nausea (which she brushes off as a harmless stomach flu). After three days, the E. coli bacteria spreads throughout the woman's body, poisoning her.
342 Die-Brator May 1, 1998 San Francisco, CA The misandristic, sociopathic leader of a fringe feminist political cult notorious for its sexually violent crimes against men returns home from her latest rally to find a vibrator from her lesbian lover, unaware that it's really a 1000-kilovolt taser that resembles a vibrator. After she inserts it into herself and activates it, the taser electrocutes the feminist, causing cardiac arrest.

Episode 30: The End is Weird[edit]

Originally aired October 19, 2010.

Title reference: Play-on words to the saying "The End is Near".

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
723 Bot-ily Harm July 25, 2002 Austin, TX A teenage boy obsessed with building robots and annoying his mom with them uses the microprocessor from his mother's Roomba to build a motion sensing robot with a sharp rotating edger blade. After dropping a screw and bending over to pick it up, the robot awakens and charges at the boy, severing two of his fingers, then slashing his foot, and after he falls to the ground, it lacerates deeply into his abdomen, killing him from excessive loss of blood.
121 Hertz So Good May 17, 2008 Tarzana, CA An exhibitionist couple have public sex on top of an old, defective transformer. The man reveals a Prince Albert piercing to his girlfriend, and once it makes contact with the transformer during intercourse, he is electrocuted. The girlfriend is unharmed, as her feet were not on the ground and all she felt was a mild tingle from her boyfriend getting shocked.
14 Harry He-Done-Y October 22, 1926 (Technically nine days later.) Montreal, Quebec, Canada Famous escape artist and magician Harry Houdini claims himself invincible to blows to the torso. A fan sends several blows to the abdomen. He collapses onstage two days later, and dies in hospital a week later of septic shock from a burst appendix.
323 Vom-Ate-Dead September 29, 2008 Atlantic City, NJ A female emetophiliac tries to get a boyfriend, but is dumped once they discover her fetish during intercourse. She goes to a hot-dog-eating-competition, hoping to have sex with the winner: a Takeru Kobayashi-esque speed eater. She ambushes him backstage, wearing nothing but high heels and lingerie to seduce him, and then jams a finger down his throat, causing him to vomit on her face. She inhales a piece of undigested hot dog and is choked to death.
506 Die-Drant November 21, 2009 Brentwood, CA A prankster uses a mirror to reflect sunlight into the eyes of passing drivers in the hopes of causing an accident. He succeeds when one driver collides with a fire hydrant, which flies into the air and hits the prankster in the face, crushing his skull.
284 Hang Dunked June 3, 1986 San Francisco, CA An egotistical bully hogs a basketball court. He makes a slam dunk and, to celebrate, hangs from the rim and pulls himself up through it. When he lets go, part of his necklace gets caught in the net and he is hanged.
873 Bad Max July 23, 2010 Malibu, CA In this imaginary tale (based on a real death, with the victim changed for legal and ethical reasons), a notorious racist and sexist movie star attempts to force his girlfriend into giving him oral sex, but she is too busy recording his abusive phone calls to sell to the press. The man then sits in his Jacuzzi, and ends up eviscerated through his anus when he sits directly on the Jacuzzi's suction pump.

Episode 31: Hurry Up and Die[edit]

Originally aired October 26, 2010.

Title reference: Spoofs the Stereophonics' song "Hurry Up and Wait".

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
957 Drunk Die-er September 9, 2009 St. Louis, MO A drunk driver, who was just released from prison for vehicular manslaughter, crashes his car and is mistakenly pronounced dead at the scene. When they find out he is an organ donor, authorities bring him to the hospital to remove his organs while he is still alive. Never finding out he is not dead yet, the doctors take out his heart, which finally causes his death.
523 Jersey Gore August 14, 2008 Newark, NJ An obnoxious man known as "The Predicament" works on his car with extremely loud music playing while his neighbor constantly and angrily tells him to turn it down. He slides out from under his car down the driveway and into the path of a street sweeper he neither saw nor heard coming on account of the noise. His head is crushed under the wheels and his body is shredded by the bristles, leaving a bloody mess on the road.
132 Cast Offed October 3, 1996 Purvis, MS While using a log splitter to prepare firewood for upcoming cold weather, a drunk Southern man gets his arm caught in the machine and breaks it. He decides to save his welfare money by creating a cast and putting it on himself, but he fails to set the bone properly and makes the cast too tight. When he cuts it off a month later, with help from his daughter, globules of bone marrow leak into his bloodstream and form a fat embolism in his heart.
412-D Lesboned June 9, 2008 Parker Strip, AZ A bisexual real estate agent notorious for having sex with her clients seduces a wealthy, lesbian prospective customer. After a tour of the house, pool, and eventually the laundry room, they strip and have sex on top of the dryer. Their movements cause its fuel line to come loose and the room fills with natural gas. When it turns on automatically, the water heater ignites the gas and sets off an explosion that kills both women.
597 Tapped Out June 16, 2005 Rockford, IL Two aspiring amateur wrestlers with dreams of going pro assault each other with increasingly insane objects, including fluorescent light bulbs. During practice, one wrestler slashes his partner in the chest with a weed whacker. While the partner who got slashed in the chest survives, the first wrestler collapses and dies from toxic shock caused by inhaling the mercury vapor from the broken bulbs and particles of mercury that entered his blood through earlier wounds.
284-A Mail Order Fried August 14, 2002 Olathe, KS An obnoxious mailman who has a second job as the target at the local carnival's dunk tank insults the customers with embarrassing secrets he culls from their mail. Over time, balls that miss the target repeatedly hit the fuse box for the tank's water heater and damage the wiring until it makes contact with the water. When one customer (a former professional baseball player who spent two years playing the game in Japan) hits the target, the mailman falls into the tank and is electrocuted.
330 Fecal Attraction September 17, 2002 Provo, UT A Keith Richards-esque rock star and notorious drug addict freaks out when he runs out of drugs and his band gets stranded in a dry town, until one of his roadies suggests that he try jenkem. When he is no longer able to defecate, he finds a port-a-potty, sticks his head in, and gets high, but suffers from a brownout and loses consciousness. Because his head is still in the toilet, he asphyxiates from lack of oxygen and excess of methane gas to his hemoglobin.

Episode 32: Death Puts On a Dunce Cap[edit]

Originally aired November 2, 2010.

Death # "Event" name Date of Death Location Circumstances of death
959 Tenta-killed March 14, 2003 Seattle, WA An overprotective, traditional Korean immigrant father who aims to scare away his daughter's boyfriend (who is Westernized) invites him for a traditional Korean dinner. After he eats live prawn and seaworms, the father requests for the boyfriend to swallow a live octopus. Once the hopeful suitor declines, the father eats his own, only for the octopus' suction cups to attach themselves to the man's trachea, causing him to choke to death.
268 Orspasm December 24, 1993 Beaverton, OR A woman who suffers from persistent genital arousal disorder is abused by her sadistic boyfriend, who takes pleasure in making her suffer involuntary orgasms. One day, as the couple climb up the stairs, the boyfriend pokes his lover in the back with a vibrating back massager. The woman goes into one of her spasms and ends up knocking her boyfriend down the stairs. The fall breaks his neck and severs his spinal cord, suffocating him to death.
61 Furdered June 4, 2010 Upper Peninsula, MI A hunter in the Michigan wilderness dressed in the pelt of an animal travels through the forest. After climbing out of one of his own spike traps and falling inches away from a bear trap, he is shot by another hunter who mistakes him for an animal. The bullet enters the man's neck and exits his hip, and he bleeds to death. (The setup is similar to Offed the Hook.)
398 Vuvu...Whatever, He's Dead November 21, 2009 Tucson, AZ, At a soccer match, a soccer-obsessed nuisance buys a vuvuzela and vigorously blows it, straining to blow harder with each successful sound. The pressure caused by blowing the horn nonstop causes a brain aneurysm.
930 Injecti-cide January 11, 2008 Monterey, CA An elderly, former supermodel and beauty queen injects corn oil into her face to keep her skin looking fresh and beautiful as a substitute for expensive Botox injections. Eventually, the oil makes her bleed out from her eyes and lips and causes cell death in her heart and lungs.
220 Scratch n' Snuffed November 2, 2008 Hattiesburg, VA A politician drops dead after being voted out of office, being humiliated by widespread news of a sex scandal involving visits to South America to see his Brazilian mistress, and going broke after his wife abandons him. When he was on one of these trips a decade earlier, he was bitten by a triatominae. After numerous visits and numerous bits, he began to develop Chagas' disease, which in turn led to a fatal cardiac arrhythmia.
503 Implo-dead July 27, 2009 Baltimore, MD A crack-addicted couple on the run from the law for murder and robbery hide out in an abandoned building, not knowing that it is slated for demolition. When the crew sets off explosives to bring down the building, tons of falling rubble crush the couple.

Episode 33: Young, Dumb, and Full of Death[edit]

Originally aired November 9, 2010

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
396 Onesie & Donesie December 7, 2008 Orlando, FL An accident-prone home shopping network salesman survives falling off a ladder and getting a piece of a samurai sword lodged in his chest (which he miraculously survives). After returning to work from the hospital from the samurai sword incident, he advertises a flannel one-piece pajama. Still wearing the pajamas, he then advertises some aromatherapy candles. When the sleeve touches the lit candles, he is engulfed in flames. The stage manager tries to put out the fire with an extinguisher, but the extinguisher clogs. The salesman dies from severe burns all over his body.
203 Hillary Snuffed November 21, 2009 Hollywood, CA A former reality TV star, under the delusion that she's still famous, snorts cocaine at a party using a platinum coke straw. A man attempts to take the woman's picture as she's snorting cocaine, and she treats the privacy invasion as a paparazzi attack. She calls in her bodyguard, who tries to snatch the camera away and punches the man in the face. The man falls on top of the reality show star as she's doing a line, and the coke straw gets lodged in her nose, puncturing her frontal lobe and causing a fatal brain hemorrhage.
704 Cruci-Fried July 19, 1978 Chattanooga, TN A phony miracle healer and minister removes the ground from a three-pronged electrical plug to a microphone amp in hopes of getting rid of an annoying hum emitting from the machine. During the service, he steps into a baptismal pool while holding the microphone and is electrocuted.
742 Hammer Head September 14, 2003 Rochester, NY A new janitor at an all-girls preparatory school lurks outside with a video camera recording teenaged field hockey players as they practice. When she notices this, one of the girls tries to hit him with the field hockey ball. The janitor ducks out of the way and continues to film them, only to get the side of his skull crushed in by a hammer thrower who threw her hammer too far.
478 Board Stiff August 9, 2009 Chicago, IL A skilled, yet washed-up skateboarder is out skating one day. His board goes over a rock, and he falls face first down a staircase into some wet cement. The impact of the fall knocks him unconscious. While unconscious, he inhales the wet cement into his trachea and suffocates.
47-A Sumowed June 22, 2006 Palo Alto, CA A corporate leader who was only hired because his father owned the company leads an employee retreat. After failing to catch his volunteer during the trust fall exercise, he dresses up in a sumo suit, and sumo-wrestles an opponent (coincidentally, his opponent was the woman whom the man forgot to catch during the trust fall). However, he set up the sumo ring too close to the edge of a cliff, and he is pushed off it by his opponent. His padded sumo suit helps him survive the fall, but not a passing car.
345 Bush Whacked May 21, 2008 Defiance, OH A man addicted to survival nature shows sets out to film himself making a spring salad from allegedly safe plants, only to become violently ill after eating them. The actual ingredients of the salad were Oleander (Nerium oleander), an herb that causes heart palpitations, Foxglove (Digitalis purpurea), a gastrointestinal irritant that causes vomiting and diarrhea, and nature's most dangerous plant: Hemlock (Conium maculatum), creating a trifecta of symptoms that kills him shortly afterwards.

Episode 34: Today's Menu: Deep Fried Death[edit]

Originally aired December 8, 2010.

Title reference: Half the deaths featured on this episode are food-related.

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
129 Lawn Of The Dead May 5, 1978 Allentown, PA In the 1970s, a man dies during a barbecue when he gets distracted by a woman flashing her breasts after he threw a lawn dart into the air, which later falls through his skull, piercing his brain, and coming out the bridge of his nose. (Comedian Charlie Murphy guest stars in this segment, providing commentary on '70s culture.)
438 Tongue Die September 4, 2008 Detroit, MI During the 2008 recession/housing crisis, a scavenger stealing metal from foreclosed homes and sells them for scrap is caught by an obese police officer and is chased. He succeeds in escaping the police officer but ends up falling into an open manhole (the lid of which was stolen by another scavenger earlier in the segment). The impact of the fall causes the man to bite off his tongue (which remains above ground), break his neck, and asphyxiate.
119 Tube Snaked August 19, 2005 Topeka, KS An underwear-clad groupie throws out her struggling musician boyfriend after his record deal falls through and tosses out his clothes, his demo CDs, and his electric guitar. As he drives away, the woman keeps her boyfriend's pet boa constrictor that almost strangles her to death. The woman successfully escapes its clutches, throws the boa on the grass, and goes back in the house to get drunk. The boa constrictor slithers back through a pipe on the side of the house used in expelling carbon monoxide. The constrictor gets stuck inside, causing a back-up of carbon monoxide, which poisons the groupie, who mistakes her carbon monoxide poisoning for alcohol intoxication.
673 R.I.P.-PED October 3, 2004 Tarzana, CA A 7-decade-old man obsessed with body building relies on not only his exercise equipment, but his juicer to build and maintain his muscles. After years of being overworked, the juicer stops, overheats, and explodes, sending the juicer's blade into the man's carotid artery.
145 Mary-nated March 5, 1908 Long Island City, NY A couple who is oblivious to her notorious past and her disease hire Mary Mallon (a.k.a. Typhoid Mary) as their cook and die from typhoid fever a month later.
802 Gooed Riddance November 21, 2009 Chicago, IL When they have a reunion they promised to have a decade ago, a group of teen girls (one of whom has become a mean girl and wants nothing to do with her childish friends anymore) play the game Chubby Bunny. The more mature one, who wins just as before, later chokes when the marshmallows melt in her mouth and clog her trachea.
259 De-Throned April 23, 2002 Las Vegas, NV A cruel, misogynistic biker forces a bar maid to be his personal housekeeper so she can pay off a gambling debt. During her time, he intentionally makes messes for her to clean up, one of which is cleaning motorcycle parts with gasoline in the living room. The maid cleans up the gasoline by sopping it up in a rag, wringing it out in a bucket, and pouring the gasoline in the toilet, but doesn't flush. The biker comes home, throws down his beer can, and goes to the bathroom. As he is on the toilet, he smokes a cigarette and tosses it between his legs into the bowl. The methane gas from his flatulence gets ignited by the cigarette and the toilet blows up, rupturing the biker's pelvic arteries and causing him to bleed to death, much to the relief and happiness of the maid.

Episode 35: Cure for the Common Death II[edit]

Originally aired December 15, 2010.

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
414 Hydrau-licked May 2, 2009 El Paso, TX An overly-protective low-rider competes against someone who he caught eyeing his girlfriend and wins the competition. But as he's celebrating, a loose spring from his car hits him in the chest and knocks him to the ground where his opponent's still bumping car crushes his skull and chest.
188 Nun-f**ked April 12, 2008 Natick, MA An inept martial arts rookie prepares to make a viral video showing off his karate skills in hopes of winning himself a girlfriend. He begins by trying to break boards, bricks and cinder blocks with his head, then starts to twirl nunchucks and accidentally hits himself in the head. The breaking attempts had weakened his skull, and the nunchuck hit fractures it, inflicting fatal brain damage.
158 Myth Busted May 3, 2006 Pierce County, WA An angry, friendless redneck, living out in the countryside, is constantly annoyed by the people who use a jogging trail on state park land near his property. To scare them off, the man dresses like Bigfoot and harasses them as they pass. One jogger notifies a park ranger, who believes in Bigfoot and shoots the "creature" with a tranquilizer dart meant to be used on large animals. The man soon dies from low blood pressure, as a reaction to etorphine in the tranquilizer.
304 Radioactivate-dead March 24, 1993 Los Angeles, CA A former Russian spy is tracked by his former employers as he sells foreign documents to the U.S. government. Knowing one of the spy's daily routines is to buy coffee from the same stand, the vendor, himself a spy, routinely spikes it with polonium-210. Roughly a month later, the former spy dies of multiple organ failure due to acute radiation poisoning. (This is loosely based on the real-life poisoning of Alexander Litvinenko.)
389 Jelly Belly-ed January 18, 2004 Cairns, Australia A group of American students take a tour of Australia (and a vacation) with their school friends. One of them is an immature, attention-starved young woman, whose bad behavior stems from being ostracized earlier in life. After angering the rest of the students with a false shark scare, she goes for a swim and accidentally swallows an Irukandji jellyfish, which stings her trachea and swells it shut, though no one notices or cares as they think she's faking it.
276 Die-Arrhea February 21, 2004 Louisville, KY An obnoxious, renowned jockey evicted from his hotel becomes desperate to win a horse race so he can retire for good, so he becomes anorexic and starts abusing illegal Chinese laxatives to lose enough weight to race. He surprisingly wins, but dies from massive dehydration, potassium deficiency, and renal failure from the laxatives he took and his lack of fluids to replenish his electrolytes.
122 Balloon-A-Tic July 25, 2009 Las Vegas, NV A girl and her friends have a bachelorette party and hire a male stripper who dresses up like a birthday party clown and performs X-rated tricks. During his final act, he performs fellatio on a balloon. When he gets the balloon deep enough, he pops it with his stomach acid. His air passage is blocked and he chokes to death.

Episode 36: Sudden Death[edit]

Originally aired December 22, 2010. Note: This is the fourth episode not to feature the death of a female.

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
435 Coffin to Death January 3, 1993 Kyoto, Japan Prior to a concert, the lead singer of a popular Japanese rock band decides to emerge from a prop coffin filled with the steam from dry ice for a theatrical entrance. However, the lead guitarist (who is feuding with the singer) decides to steal the spotlight by performing an excessively long, 3-minute guitar solo on top of the coffin, trapping the singer inside the coffin and away from fresh air, resulting in his asphyxiation.
194 Poker Face September 8, 1938 Joliet, IL An inmate on death row receives a deck of playing cards from a friend to use in building a pipe bomb as part of an escape plan. He breaks a metal leg from his bed, packs it with torn-up cards and water, and sets it on his cell's heater. When it doesn't explode, he picks it up only to have it detonate in his hands due to the sudden mixing of the water and the cards' flammable nitrocellulose coating. The prisoner dies from shrapnel injuries to his face.
415 Bed Buggered October 14, 2004 Columbus, OH Two college roommates (a jock and a geek) share a dorm room, with the latter continually being made to leave whenever the former brings a date to the dorm. One night, the geek finally brings a date to the room, and has sex with her on top of the bunk beds while the jock harasses the two of them from below. The movements of the couple cause the top bunk to fall on the jock and fatally crush him. Based on a similar scene from Black Sheep
578 Corset Killed Him January 22, 2009 New York, NY An arrogant, overweight, doughnut-eating ballroom dancer uses a corset to make himself look thin, but laces it too tight. While he is arguing with his dance partner, the corset compresses his chest and fractures one of his ribs so that it punctures his heart, causing death by internal bleeding and cardiac arrest.
692 Gone Fission November 11, 2009 Yemen A duo of would-be terrorists are constructing a plutonium nuclear bomb when one of them accidentally drops a tungsten carbide brick on the radioactive core (due to a burp after eating a burger), causing a massive surge of radiation. The surge destroys their immune systems and both men are overcome with extreme nausea and become bedridden, eventually dying of bacterial pneumonia and asphyxiation as their lungs fill with fluid.
63 Falling Down On The Job June 7, 1993 Boise, ID A lazy construction worker uses a rope elevator designed for bringing tools to the upper floors of a building. On his way up, the rope snaps and he plummets to his death, suffering multiple fractures and dying of hemorrhaging when he hits the ground.
888 Ex-Squeezed 1581 London, England A prisoner is sentenced to die on a torture rack, but he is so tall that the machine cannot stretch his body. His executioner, Sir William Skeffington invents the Scavenger's Daughter, a device that forces the man into a fetal position while two metal arms crush his ribs and lungs. The prisoner dies of blood loss and puncture wounds.

Episode 37: Dying to Tell the Story[edit]

Originally aired December 29, 2010.

Death # "Event" Name Date of Death Location Circumstances of Death
794 African't March 24, 1994 Tanzania, Africa A rich, spoiled man and his sister tour in the Serengeti, and get frustrated over how boring the safari is. They soon abandon their tour guide in search of some excitement (against the tour guide's warnings), and get very tired and dehydrated. They both pass out under a tree. Hours later, the man's sister wakes up to find that a colony of driver ants has eaten her brother alive from the inside out. The sister (who runs screaming into the wild) survives because the perfume she had on was treated with a chemical commonly used in insect repellent.
645 Amish-Tinguished October 31, 2005 Philadelphia, PA An Amish boy sent to the city as part of Rumspringa is coaxed into a Halloween party by guests who think the Amish boy's look is a costume. The boy is coaxed into a few drinks and becomes the life of the party, until he collapses and dies, unaware that he wasn't born with an enzyme that aids in breaking down alcohol.
416 Trucked Up August 2, 2006 Ithaca, NY A teenager shows off his car to his girlfriend, but his obnoxious cousin also shows off his new pickup truck. While showing off eight ball on his gear shift, he leaves the car in gear. When he activates the remote starter, the truck lurches forward, popped out of gear, knocks him on the ground and then crushes his skull with the tires.
212 Surfin' Turd July 19, 2010 Malibu, CA A rude surfer often parks his convertible in handicapped parking spaces. When confronted by him, the surfer refuses to confront a Vietnam War veteran who had lost his leg, opting instead to drive away. The surfboard pivots sideways due to quick acceleration of his car, hits a street sign and severs the surfer's head from his spinal cord, breaking his neck.
169 Chess Pain January 1, 1977 Leningrad, USSR A Soviet chess master challenges a chess robot to a match, using a board fitted with electromagnets and metal pieces that respond to the robot's moves. The man sweats profusely under the stress of the game, and when he touches one piece, he is electrocuted because the board wasn't properly grounded.
315 Little Chop Of Horrors June 11, 2005 Detroit, MI A chop shop owner cheats two criminals out of a car, attempting to profit from its engine. As he works under the car to loosen the mounts, the chain holding up the engine breaks, dropping it onto his chest and crushing him.
452 'Dis Still Killed 'Em April 22, 1931 Morgantown, WV At the height of both the Prohibition Era and the Great Depression, a poor, Appalachian couple decide to make money by selling moonshine. They sample the first liquid produced by their still, not realizing that it contains pure methanol, which causes blindness and eventual organ failure.


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