John Patrick Thomson is an English comedian, narrator and actor best known for his roles in The Fast Show, Men Behaving Badly, Cold Feet, 24 Hour Party People, The Brothers Grimsby and Coronation Street.

The Fast Show, known as Brilliant in the US, is a BBC comedy sketch show that ran from 1994 to 1997, with specials in 2000 and 2014. The show's central performers were Paul Whitehouse, Charlie Higson, Simon Day, Mark Williams, John Thomson, Arabella Weir and Caroline Aherne. Other significant cast members included Felix Dexter, Paul Shearer, Rhys Thomas, Jeff Harding, Maria McErlane, Eryl Maynard, Colin McFarlane and Donna Ewin.